I found this in my email.
Are we ever in trouble in a few years from now.
The following questions were set in last year's GED examination
These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)............and they WILL breed.
Q. Name the four seasons?
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink,
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q. How is dew formed?
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q. What causes the tides in the oceans?
A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight.
Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed.
Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election
Q. What are steroids?
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs (Shoot yourself now, there is little hope!)
Q.. What happens to your body as you age?
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. (So true!)
Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A. Premature death.
Q. What is artificial insemination?
A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour?
A. Keep it in the cow. (Simple, but brilliant!)
Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorised? (e.g. The abdomen)
A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity.
The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and
the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A, E, I,O,U.. ( WTF!)
Q. What is the fibula?
A. A small lie
Q. What does 'varicose' mean?
Q. What is the most common form of birth control?
A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium (That would work!)
Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'.
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman Emperor. (Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit.)
Q. What is a terminal illness?
A. When you are sick at the airport. (Irrefutable!)
Q. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A. Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas.
Q. Use the word 'judicious' in a sentence to show you understand its meaning.
A. Hands that judicious can be soft as your face. (OMG!)
Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight. (Brilliant!)
Ha ha ha....
Friday, February 18, 2011
I'm a Donna Karan fan, and so I couldn't stop dreaming of wearing one of these...
From the Donna Karan 2011 Spring collection:
Just wishful thinking...
From the Donna Karan 2011 Spring collection:
And maybe this for a wedding dress...
Just wishful thinking...
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
It was a rare valentine's day that greeted me yesterday as I received a letter from world vision in the mail. First I thought it was just a regular mail update from them. But when I opened it, it was a sad news about one of my sponsored child.
The letter had a very interesting introduction about my sponsored child, Dember. There was an initial concern while I was reading the first few lines, and I thought it would end up saying that a tragic event happened - that we lost him. I almost wanted to stop reading because I was scared to learn of the bad news.
I've been with world vision since 2006, and I have two sponsored boys that I've been supporting and following up through the years. One in the Philippines, and one in Bangladesh. With so much committment to provide sufficient education to these kids, I become fond of them, and even grown to love them. Everytime world vision sends me their daily development reports, I've accustomed to that feeling of joy to see how much the boys have improved by looking at their photos and reading their accomplishments. It's like watching my baby sibling, or a member of my relative grow up. And just like them, I've considered these two boys as part of my family too, though I haven't met them personally. I've been actually planning to set-up a visit through world vision to see Dember on my forthcoming holidays to the Philippines.
So as I continue reading the letter, world vision says that Dember has left their care to find a job. I couldn't help holding back my tears. The boy is just about 15 years old, if my math is right...When world vision sent me his photo 5 years ago, he was just a little boy. Then the last photo I received, he's like 5'4 or more because he plays basketball...
Not only was I sad that he left the care of world vision, but I was even sadder to the thought that life must be really hard down there for him to make a choice - he chose work over school. I feel terribly sorry for him. How could a 15-year boy opted to work and quit school? But then, there could be more significant reasons why he choose what he chose.
Finally on the letter, world vision says that they've selected another child for me to sponsor. And they've enclosed a photo of him. It's another good-looking little boy from the Philippines. They say that if I'd like to change or to cancel, I could always call their office. But it's never my trait to refuse a blessing - "To whom much is given, much is expected" I just hope this time, this new sponsored child of mine will persevere, and reap the fruits of my blessings later on in life.
Friday, February 11, 2011
I love the Superstar song by the Carpenters. Everytime I hear it, I've always drawn to retrospecting. I'm not even an oldie-junkie person, but only this particular old song that always brings me back to some good old memories.
They say, if a song means so much to you, that's because it's associated with something remarkable in your past. Interesting. But I couldn't remember an occasion that I could relate to this song. All I know is, I get flashes of beautiful memories when it plays on the radio - to the point of holding back a teary-eye.
The heart's day is buzzing in the air. It's that time to get mushy and romantic. May you get cozy with your Superstar...
Long ago and oh so far away
I fell in love with you before the second show
Your guitar, it sounds so sweet and clear
But you're not really here
It's just the radio
(*) Don't you remember you told me you loved me baby
You said you'd be coming back this way again baby
Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby, I love you I really do
Loneliness is a such a sad affair
And I can hardly wait to be with you again
What to say to make you come again
Come back to me again
And play your sad guitar
Repeat (*) twice